In response to Matticus, I weigh anchor on this issue of class based love. How can I not? There ain’t no class nowhere that matches the sheer lovin’ prowess of a mage.
Mages can commit to one lover, or two, or three, or a dozen, if need be. Snuggle up against yer femme mage, an’ suggest ye bring in somebody else… mebbe a shammy (totems), an’ she’ll be up fer it. Mages be just as strong wit AoE as they be wit one target.
Bigger and Better CoC
Mages be the only class in the game what can improve their CoC. A 45% improvement, ta be exact. Ladies and wenchies, trust me on this ‘un… there ain’t nothin’ that can match a fully specced CoC.
Say what ye like about wiggly hand motions, we mages know how to use we hands. Whether ye wan’ it ta be hot, or cold, or jus’ damn fine, we got ya covered. Wanna bring a block of ice inta th’bedroom? We got it. Wanna have us focus our magics into the best damn massage ya ever had? We got it. Wanna experience the “breath” of a dragon itself, without all the pointy? We damn well got it.
If’n it pleases ye, a mage can even go Slow…
Need I say more?
We mages are a class that loves ta fool around. Tryin’ out completely new spells, new… accessories, experimentin’ wit new “rotations”, it’s what we do best. Magi spend literally hours researchin’ and testin’ methods that are guaranteed to produce the best results.
Fire in the hole!
Thar be nobody around who can match the sheer fiery passion of a mage. Priests can boast about they inner fire all they wish; our fire is all on the outside. We got balls o’ fire, and we be unafeared o’ usin’ ‘em. There’s a fire in our soul, and it’s burnin’ wit a passion for thee. Hot Streak and Firestarter be more than just words.
Snares? Check. Silence? Check. Wish ta play wit Sheep or Pigs? We mages can provided all that an’ so much more! Penguins, and even turtles, if that’s how ye roll. It’ll take some convinvin’ and grindin’ though, ta get ye olde loggerhead outta his shell.
Ever heard of the Arctic Reach around?
- Dating and/or bedding a mage can have very serious side effects. Please note the following:
- Some mages suffer from a burning determination, and are immune to any silence or interrupting effects. These mages will likely never listen to you, and should you dump them, they will follow you to the ends of the world.
- Sometimes, mage “spells” can carry quite an impact. Use protection. Bring a Paladin if your mage is abnormally eager.
- Please be aware that quite a few mages are very… erm, fast. Blazing fast. Plan accordingly.
- Some mages have very cold hands. This phenomenon is referred to as “Fingers of Frost”. It is thought that this ailment stems from the Icy Veins that quite a few mages suffer from. Try lighting a fire beforehand, get those chilled to the bone hands warmed up a little. Beware of frostbite.
- Not all mages have a staff.
- Mages quite often erect powerful emotional barriers around themselves. While this can make them seem quite distant, please do not be alarmed. Mages are quite adept at dealing with things at range. Also, bear in mind that shattering these barriers can cause a mage to snap.
- Mages are capable of vanishing on you just as fast as any rogue. Unfortunately, whereas a rogue will sometimes disappear merely to get to a more advantageous position, when a mage turns up invisible, he’s likely running as fast as he can go.
- Mages can also suffer very seriously from burnout. Please use appropriate lubricant, and give your mage time to recover if s/he shows signs of wearing out. Do not hesitate to help your mage get some more stamina, it is an area where all mages are somewhat lacking.