OMG! The patch notes for 2.4 have been leaked!
Let’s see what kind of idiocy the guy who came up with these thought of… (more…)
I had originally intended this as a reply to Mera’s comment on raiding fire, but as I delved into the matter, I found that I had far too much information to divulge here.
The comment was thus:
“Actually, for base damage per second, smite is the base spell in the game.”
Hmm… quite a claim you’ve made there, Mera.
In my old troll days, I most likely would have replied with “rofl, nub”, but I am a respektible blooger now, and I should craft something intelligent to reply with.
So off I go to investigate this, comparing fireball to smite, to find out which of these spells is… I dunno, better I guess. (more…)
Raiding as fire.
We’re talking 47 points of awesome into the fire tree, and the others spent wherever you deem fit.
And it works. (more…)
Even we, the elite of the arcane, masters of fire, have our dirty little secrets.
And where better to admit them then here?
We only drop Refreshment Tables in battlegrounds because we’re too lazy to summon our own food and water.
Then, we click them as fast as possible, to empty the table in seconds. Then, we delete all the manna biscuits, besides the ~100 we need, and then blame the hunter next to us for draining the table.
At this point, we tell everyone else that its on cooldown, sorry they missed the biscuits.
The only reason we spec frost to level is because frostbolt makes a really cool noise when you shoot it.
We cast Blizzard on the melee in the Shade of Aran fight, and see how many panic and run out.
We go an entire raid casting only Scorch, because we’re playing on a laptop and watching a Zombie movie with our friends.
We always spellsteal a Paladin’s “Wings” because, quite frankly, they look better on a mage.
We all secretly wish we had rolled gnome mages.
We all have an inexplicable loathing of retribution Paladins.
If anyone gets mind controlled in a raid, we will do our utmost to kill that person as fast as possible.
If we see a warrior pop Spell Reflect, we cast Polymorph to get a free heal.
We ninja killing blows in battlegrounds with Fireblast.
We will gladly cast Pyroblast on level 1 critters to pad our WWS damage reports.
We all secretly lust for female dranei.
We all have warlock alts.
We love to ride at about 110-120% threat to make the tanks sweat.
We secretly love to be turned into Little Red Riding Hood.
When blizzard stopped letting us summon Portals to Capital Cities in battlegrounds, we mages wept.
Dropping somebody to 1% in a battleground, then casting slow on them and melee’ing them turns us on.
Wehn we meet hunters in a battleground, we take pleasure in killing the pet then running away. Ice blocking, jumping off a cliff, whatever, so the hunter cannot kill us. Then we do it again a few minutes later.
We heal the other side in battlegrounds.
We break our own sheeps and blame someone else. After all, what kind of mage breaks their own sheep? Right?
Restoration druids make us cry.
We use Ice Block at 1% just to be a prick.
We keep polymorph right next to the Arcane Power + Trinket + Presence of Mind + Frostbolt + Icy Veins macro, so people will know how awesome I am… by accident.
We spec to get Imp. Flame Ward, and then run around FRAPSing ourselves reflecting Fire spells.
We all break out into a cold sweat when we’re low on Teleportation Runes.
We love to sheep sheep.
1) Able to be used on both Beasts and Humanoids, it is an extremely effective crowd control spell, used everywhere from Wailing Caverns to Serpentshrine Cavern to Sunken Temple to Black Temple. So many mobs are susceptible to Polymorph, it is almost a universally good crowd control device.
2) It is spammable. Some crowd control abilities, like a hunter’s freezing trap, come with cooldowns attached. Polymorph does not have a cooldown.
3) Polymorph is a crowd control spell that is brought to the mob in question. Again comparing to a hunter’s freezing trap, polymorph has a 30 yard range, and as such can be casted at a mob that is still yards away. Freezing trap requires the mob to come to the trap, which requires a lot more precision and skill to use properly. Any dumbass can use Polymorph correctly.
4) The mob barely moves once controlled. A warlock’s fear “controls” the mob, but it is still running about like an idiot. There is serious danger that other mobs will be pulled. A sheep doesn’t leave the same 4 yard zone, and most importantly, if other mobs path over it, they do not aggro. Apparently, there is nothing suspicious about a cute piggy named “Incredibly Powerful Naga”.
5) It lasts a very long time. Max ranked Polymorph lasts a hefty 50 seconds, which means in your average instance, you can sheep it, and then forget about it for almost a minute.
“maeg tabl now kkthx”
“Sorry, I’m Chair Spec”
Standing Around Orgrimmar
“plz giv watr”
“You say plz because please takes too long to type. I say no rather than yes for the same reason”
“hey can i hav sum waters?”
“Sorry 😦 I’m fire specced, can’t make water atm”
“yo mage water?”
“need 3 stacks water”
“Sorry, food specced”
(NOTE: This didn’t actually work)
*I put 500 gold into the window*
“hey i need some food”
“Sure thing.” *Invites to party* *Makes portal to Thunder Bluff*
“Click for food”
Standing Around Shattrath
“can yo make me some water?”
*Run and hide*
“i need a coupla stak s water”
“hey, can i have some Water?”
“There’s actually a secret way to make your own water. When you throw a snowball at any fire elemental mob, when you loot the elementals body, it gives you water of whatever rank the elenmental was”
“Yeah! I just found that out yesterday! Go try it out!”
“Alright, thanks man!” *Runs off to flight path*
*20 minutes later*
“YOO FUCKING ASSHOLE”
“Yo mage, make us a table”
“Sorry, guys, it has a one hour cooldown 😦 Can’t do that yet”
(NOTE: the other mage in the BG whispered me: “i fucking love you”)
Me on my Hunter Alt to a 70 mage on Orgrimmar
“Oh Mighty Master of the Arcane… May this worthless pile of pixels beg of you for but a small drink, so that he may quench his unworthy thirst upon your Holy Nectar of the God’s Themselves?”
(NOTE: Shamelessly stolen from the forums, it works incredibly well. Have never, ever been turned down with this proposition)
Did this up for my guild, so’s peeps would have an idea of what mages do raid-wise, specific to Anathema anyways.
It’s occured to me that this guild has not had much exposure to mages as a class.
When me and Vox joined, you guys had… what, Sequel?
So I figured I’d put up this post here, in an effort to (briefly) explain how mages work, and most importantly, how us mages currently affect our current raids/dps make-ups and such.
Any wacko with half a brain can say “Mages does DPS, yuh” but feh.
First off. This guild already has incredibly strong DPS capacity. We have multiple hunters and rogues that consistently do incredibly high amounts of damage, and a couple other caster types who make me feel all sad and happy at the same time (I’m looking at you, Abby and Mord).
Frankly, we could drop a DPS group entirely and we’d be fine, damage wise. I mean, we have, what, 4 minutes to spare on average for Void Reaver?
In this regard, Anathema does not really need to have us few mages go all out balls-to-the-wall, because we already have the DPS there. We aren’t filling in any holes, because there simply aren’t any holes to fill.
You need look no further than some of our random WWS stats pages to see that the magey DPS is always on the low end of the list.
I can QQ all I want, mage DPS is gimped, blah blah, cry, whine, bitch, warlocks are better, blah blah I want some fucking pie. (more…)