Some of you ridiculously long readers may remember a crazy guy named Voxmortis. Suffice to say, he’s an extremely good friend of mine. We used to get up to all sorts of crazy crap. Until he quit the game, the bastard.
Anyway, he’s back, and playing a Death Knight of all things. In fact, we’re leveling our DK’s together because that’s what obsessed friends do.
We arrive in Terokkar, ready for some hard questing. We see that the timer for the Bone Waste towers is a mere 5 minutes.
“Hey!” says we, “If we can grab those, that gives us a damage AND experience boost!”
So off we rode into the Bone Wastes, fully prepared to flag and stand around with no fighting involved at all.
We had taken the towers in Zangarmarsh the day before, and met no resistance. We didn’t expect this to be any different.
Imagine our surprise and disappointment when we arrived at the nearest tower to Stonebreaker Hold and discovered a flagged level 80 Paladin.
Fortunately, we weren’t flagged yet (still 4 minutes left on the towers), and we both assumed we would die anyways once the towers went into free-for-all mode.
But… still, what’s the point in not trying?
So we rode to the next tower, and waited. We flagged, and waited. Slowly, but surely, we took the tower. Meanwhile, the other nearby towers were taken in the name of the alliance.
Within a couple minutes, there alliance had three towers, the horde had one, and there was one left open.
Then the Paladin arrived.
Two level 65 DK’s (both of us Unholy) versus an 80 tankadin (only 19k HP though, he wasn’t that well geared). Basically it was a one way fight we knew we couldn’t win.
But we fought anyways.
We discovered quickly that the Paladin was a keyboard turner, so we attempted to abuse his inability to turn around quickly to our advantage. We were wearing him down, (actually got him to about 60%), but then all of a sudden, there was a Shadow Priest (also 80).
Mind Flay! Mind Flay! Mind Blast! Both of us were dieded.
So the alliance capped that tower, and moved on.
“Well, we tried. Better luck next time” we thought.
I said “I’m going to rez and see if I can prevent them from keeping this tower. If anything, I can harass them for a while. Maybe if we annoy them enough, they’ll give up!”
So I rezzed. I threw up Bone Shield. Summoned my zombie. Hid in a nook, and contested the tower. Within seconds of this tower no longer being in control of the alliance, they took the final tower.
If I hadn’t rezzed, the alliance would’ve taken the Bone Wastes, and that would’ve been it.
My delay tactic was perfectly timed. At the other end of the zone, an 80 druid had just arrived, and was countercapping the other towers.
We did die many a time, however. The paladin and priest came back. We died again.
Y’see, we refused to give up. We fought. Two 65 DKs, versus an 80 paladin and priest.
Vox attempted to use the tower as a pillar, and hump it to escape the priest. I attacked the priest from behind (honour is for wimps). Turns out, the priest is a keyboard turner too, a dangerous thing to be when you’re a caster fighting a melee enemy.
I think you can see where I’m going with this.
As I was constantly moving to stay behind the priest, he didn’t get many casts off. A few instants here and there, but nothing with a cast time. Thankfully, Mind Freeze didn’t miss when he tried to use Mind Flay. Blew Strangulate, too, but I think that was resisted.
Me: “I’m going to kill this priest if it’s the last thing I do!”
Vox: “It will be the last thing you d- WHAT?! A rogue?!”
Vox had just been ambushed and killed by a 73 rogue.
Me: “… Ha. HA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! I JUST KILLED THE PRIEST!”.
And then I died against the rogue. (I nearly won, but he used a health potion to avoid death.)
I wish I could know what the priest was thinking. What was it like on his end? Is he going to tell anyone he was defeated in 1v1 combat by a 65 Death Knight? Is he going to go to the official forums and cry endlessly for DK nerfs?
Or am I just that friggin’ awesome? No? Well, I can always dream.
Shortly after, the Horde managed to take all five towers. To recap:
HORDE: two 65 DKs and an 80 druid
ALLIANCE: 80 Paladin, 80 Priest, 73 Rogue
We rode back to Stonebreaker Hold, laughing, high fiving, and stroking our own e-peens with the vigor one can only get from defeating what should’ve been a vastly superior opponent.
We were attacked again by the Paladin, who followed us for the explicit reason of ascertaining revenge. He did kill us one last time, but it took him a very, very long time to do so. Minutes.
We were basically hammering him with diseases and Death Strikes to try and out heal the damage we were taking from Seal of Corruption, but we couldn’t really stop him from getting Holy Light casts off.
Who’s awesome? We’re awesome!
No, you’re awesome!
Thanks, you’re awesome!
E-peen stroking aside, this just goes to show you that there’s no such thing as an unwinnable fight.
If it all looks hopeless, start thinking like a bastard. The only reason I rezzed when I did was out of spite. I had intended to delay the alliance as long as possible, with the intention of merely harassing them as long as possible.
My opponents were keyboard turners, so I exploited that weakness as much as I could. Being behind the paladin prevents him from attacking me, being behind the priest prevents him from being able to cast at me.
There’s no such thing as a fair fight.