As with all things psychologists blame on childhood, my generally anti-social tendencies started when I was extremely young.
When I was born, I was born unnaturally pale. The medical staff freaked, and immediately rushed me into one of those isolation incubator things that hospitals have to try and keep babies from dying. I was kept there for a full 48 hours before finally seeing my mother.
As it turns out, there was nothing wrong with me, I was just pale. That’s all.
Of course, the damage was already done. Having been totally isolated from other human beings for two days straight, it was extremely difficult for anyone to get any sort of emotional response out of me.
In fact, I didn’t even smile until I was about nine months old.
By comparison, my sister, who wasn’t even… erm… cleaned off before the doc tossed her up for my mother to hold. My sister followed mom everywhere, and would burst into hysterical tears if she lost visual contact.
Me? I couldn’t care less.
So then why the facade of politeness and friendliness? It’s simple, really.
My mom had exactly one goal with her children. She wanted to be able to go out in public without her offspring acting like tantrum throwing pricks, like most children do.
It was drilled into us from a very young age. Be polite, be friendly, be normal human beings, rather than bags filled with hate and selfish desires.
It worked, obviously. Everyone loved us. We were the pride of family reunions; while our cousins ran around being the obnoxious snots they were, my sister and I sat politely and respectively. The adults crooned over us, marveling at how well behaved we were.
In me, this resulted in me being unfailingly polite and friendly, while still being just as anti-social as the most introverted around.
So nowadays, I despise talking with strangers, but I’m way too polite to say anything about it. I always think of things like “Ok, next time some random stranger tries to start a conversation, I’ll start singing ‘Bounce With Me'”, but I never do!
So anyway, if you ever meet someone in RL that seems polite to you, chances are they just want you to die so they can move on in peace.
This should’ve gone into the original post, yet somehow didn’t. Oh well, here it is.
It may seem incongruous that I’m an introvert, yet blog constantly, and will happily reply to any e-mail I get.
It really isn’t, though.
Y’see, I can blog and respond to e-mails on my terms. When I blog, it’s because I sat down, logged into wordpress, came up with a post, checked spelling, reread for obvious grammar mistakes, and so forth. I wasn’t suddenly confronted with it when I went to fetch some crackers.
My e-mail doesn’t suddenly flash up and say “HEY ANSWER THIS E-MAIL” when I’m walking down the street or riding the bus.
If I’m going to participate in these forms of communication, it’s because I chose to do so and planned it out in advance. I’ve always been a huge fan of forumseseses. They function like a real conversation, but where everyone involved can jump in or out according to their own wishes, and never seem rude for doing so.
In RL, if somebody suddenly stopped participating in the conversation at hand and stared blankly into space, and then jumped right back in two minutes later, everyone would think that guy had a seizure or something.
Not so on the internet. Such seizures are perfectly normal.